I Wrote a Book
Bucket list be damned, I wrote and (self) published a book.
It took me the better part of three years to get the thing out here in the ethos of uninterested doom-scrolling, partly due to my habit of starting and stopping the writing/editing process whenever the wind blew my way in that sweet smelling seductive creative fashion. Finally I can throw my arms back and say "Look at me Mum" having finally completed something I had dreamt of doing since I sat my Nans kitchen table and doodled little stories on the scrap paper she would provide me with every Thursday after school.
I am a published author with my very own horror novel just sitting out their in the world for all to see, purchase and judge, its a strange feeling of catharsis but also a weird weight on my chest that I thought I would shift when I finally had the finished copy in my hand. I think that weight is asking:
"What comes next?".
Diving into the book itself; Organ is a body horror story about a young man named Oscar Rubens, who discovers a strange growing mass from the side of his body. Organ follows Oscars journey for answers and salvation as his world descends into nightmarish otherworldly chaos, mental torture and the struggles he faces trying to save his life before it is twisted and molded into something unpleasantly vile.
Honestly, I know I shouldn't be saying this about my own book because its gross, but its a really fun read and despite my own nervousness about the expectations. I think its going to be a popular little book amongst horror fans, especially those who love a bit of Cronenberg horror and those late 80's nasty gruesome tales of scary small town hauntings.
Oscar came about after a real life issue I had with a painful lump left over from a muscular tear that I left untreated (and undiagnosed) for significantly longer than I should have, but no shame in admitting you are wrong, especially since I still noodling about having "learnt my lesson". The character of Oscar Rubens is modelled after two young men I have had the joy of knowing, one being my brother Freddie and the other a lad named Oscar who I worked with during the pandemic. I enjoyed writing the character and taking traits from them both to develop and expand Oscar Rubens as a person living in this ghoulish nightmare tale.
If you are keen to help a budding author out, the book is available on the dreaded Amazon shop and on Kindle, its cheaper on Kindle because I gain significantly less from physical book sales hence the higher price for paperback. Thank the lovely ruthless world of self-publishing that billions are flooding into every year.
"Answer the question"
What does come next? I asked myself the same thing when I clicked submit to upload Organ out into the world and I asked myself the question once more when I began seeing the handful of sales trickle in. I took a bit of a break, unwound, caught up on some movies and spent some time playing about with my brothers, then I jumped straight back into the chair and started my next piece.
Thankfully this next one requires less world building and more honest recollection with a pinch of dressing up, I am writing a non-fiction book on my experiences digging graves in a woodland burial park. Now if you know me, you will of course know the exact burial park, but for legal reasons and the sake of the staff that still work there that I actually LIKE. I cant name it directly. That being said, it will be a spooky, heart-breaking, unsettling and revealing look behind the curtain into the world of grave digging in the modern age and the struggles both physically, spiritually and emotionally that those working in the industry face.
It is currently titled: Digging Graves. Original I know, but it will include poems (that I have written while working there to process my experiences of being so close to death) and go into revealing detail on stories such as the ghost that drums in the forest, spirit animals actually manifesting before a group of people and the ungraceful world of physically handling remains. So keep an eye out for it, honestly I suck at this marketing aspect as I just want to write, but actively refuse to engage with marketing groups as they are just everything wrong with modern mans affinity for artistic freedom.
"Okay! Okay! Stop talking!"
This turned into a long piece of nothing didn't it? I will end your suffering and say goodbye for now, until I forget this blog exists, remember it and come rushing back to post another long piece that will likely bore you to tears. I don't have to be articulate in this space, I think of my blog like a receptacle for my thought vomit.
I will post the link to my book that's available on Amazon and Kindle. Give it a go and tell me what you think. Bye for now.
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