Organ - Chapter 6
Anxiety adorned her just as her nurses uniform clung to her narrow shoulders, it was nauseating and Katie was still unsure what to expect from today’s meeting with the board of the hospitals liability team, they would determine her professional future after what had happened with Oscar, the night he almost suffocated played carelessly in her dreams ever since and the vitriolic rage she felt that day from Mrs Rubens still stung her pride. Katie accepted the mistake she made in leaving the room that evening but still had hold of this lingering idea that she had heard a voice, the coffee break felt justifiable albeit unprofessional.
This was not the energy Katie wanted to bring into this meeting; this was going to be a board of old suits who held her future in this profession in their wrinkled entitled hands. Katie needed to do what she had always done to get by in this hospital, smile at the right people, shake the right hands and turn a blind eye to the obvious pig-headed way they spoke to her with their barrage of “sweethearts” and “darlings,” grovelling for her career felt disgusting as a putrid sour taste in her mouth. That morning was the first time she had set foot back in Greenwood Hospital since the incident. She closed the door on her car, butterflies filled her stomach again, uninvited and squatting deep in her bowels, Katie had been drawing up various arguments in her head since she was sent home by Boothe. Anger grew across her brow as she remembered the shit eating ‘sympathetic’ grin that he wore across his face like a jesters mask.
She had been working over a couple of paths to take in defence of her position in the story of that evening when it all went wrong, possibilities of blaming Boothe had crept into her notes, but going directly after a potentially ‘missed’ diagnosis from the senior chief of medicine was a sure-fire way of unleashing his vengeance that only a handful of the hospital staff had the misfortune of seeing first hand. If Boothe had heard from one of his old friends on the board that Katie was attempting to pin some or all of the blame on him, Katie knew that her career would be all buried six feet beneath the hospital and most likely almost all medical facilities within the country, she heard her mother’s words in her head that she trusted to recite in times such as this,
“Never underestimate the depths a wounded proud man will go to, to hurt you,” Katie lost in thoughts had not noticed that eager steps had already carried her to the entrance,
the doors slid open and the wafting pungent chemical smell from the morning cleaning greeted her, offering her a sterile invite into the battlefield of bureaucracy.
Katie made her way up to the nurses station and greeted a couple of colleagues who still felt brave enough to talk to her, the fear that association with staff under scrutiny was very real amongst this workforce, Katie understood it, but still felt abandoned by the nurses.
“You okay Kate?” asked a passing younger nurse, her arms full of empty clipboards and her footsteps slowly becoming squeakier as the late shift wore her down.
“Yes, all good, thank you” Katie replied with gentle politeness, but being asked the question shook her and the butterflies burst into rude flutter.
She flicked the face of her wrist watch up towards her and reluctantly accepted it was time to find the meeting room upstairs for the review, Katie clocked in out of habit at the machine near the nurses station and began the journey upstairs. Jarring ‘clunks’ sounded as she jostled with the sticking door knob that brought those already sitting at the large table to the attention of the entering nurse, Katie smiled half-heartedly across the room without making eye contact with any particular person and stepped in, as she attempted to shut the door behind her another body stepped in the frame and stopped it with their foot. It was Boothe, he was being recalled as a witness Katie was later informed, but his mere presence sent panic thundering through her body. He was unpredictable at the best of times and his attendance meant he was most definitely here for blood, Katie saw it in his sharkish eyes, they seemed younger, as they always did when he was scheming up a plan to make the hospital function “more efficiently” or giving someone news he believed to be good.
“Hello Katherine” he offered as he squeezed all too close past her in the entrance to the room, Katie awoke from her freeze and found herself awkwardly still blocking the better part of the entryway.
“Hello Doctor” she replied in reflex. Boothe leaned into her personal space, his breath reeking with the scent of gum, his attempt to hide his gingivitis, “Don’t worry, I am here to help” he whispered in hush tones leaving his breath lingering warm against her cheek.
It gave her no ease, memories of her first year at the hospital being revived by his behaviour, but she buried them again, shovels of progress in her career poured wet icy dirt onto these feelings as they sat back to rest once again as Katie took a seat at the ridiculously large, varnished table. The room filled over the few minutes past since Katie took her seat and put away a glass of water from the shared pitcher, Boothe sat opposite her, she half listened as her superior made idle small talk with the other board members and a couple of faces Katie did not recognise. His playful body language was throwing her composure for a loop; after seeing him barge into the room, Katie had assumed he was here to railroad her career and hand the board his recommendation that she should be terminated with immediate effect, thus removing himself from any blame regarding Oscars incident.
“Thank you all for coming today” a voice from the far end of the table began, “I wish it were under happier circumstances that we finally meet Katherine, but we are here as you know evaluate the events and your actions on the night that a patient in your care was harmed. We will determine if the actions you took on that evening were in fact negligent of your commitment to protect and care for our patients and also review any evidence or supporting statements yourself or Chief of Medicine Doctor Boothe would wish to present” he finally finished laying down his sheet of paper from which he read this cold greeting.
Those seated at the table shuffled as deliberations began.
“Chief of Medicine Doctor Boothe has requested to be here today for this evaluation with the permission of the board to provide clear and concise recollections of the nights events that led to a patient, Oscar Rubens, becoming temporarily asphyxiated in the care of Nurse Katie Hanley” the ivory-haired well-dressed board member continued. “Would anyone like to make any opening statements before we proceed?” asked the man to the speakers right.
Yet more uncomfortable shuffling echoed throughout the moments of prolonged silence.
“I will” Boothe interrupted the calm, his voice proud and louder than the those before him.
Katie eyeballed him nervously, he took no paper from his pocket, he was improvising, perhaps rehearsed she thought to herself.
“Oscar Rubens has been a particularly difficult patient to diagnose, his symptoms have been wide ranging, seemingly sporadic and frequently changing in both locations of centralised ache and length of time this “pain” has been experienced by the patient” Boothe began.
Katie fought back a visible wince when he air quoted the word pain for the entertainment of these out of touch suits who scoffed and snickered amongst themselves.
“I have been in charge of this hospital for over 9 years” he paused half expecting an applause “I have been treating patients for twice that length as a senior surgeon and practising member of the Greenwood Heart team. Why do I mention this? To highlight the difficulty, I have faced personally in treating and digging into the root of this young man’s problems since he was admitted to the hospital, we are treating something I have never encountered before, something new and with that comes all manner of unfortunate teething issues” Boothe declared to the room, glancing at the faces as he did.
Katie was stunned, breathless, Boothe was seemingly building a platform to defend her, or at least give her enough wiggle room to defend herself when the time came for the noose to dangler teasingly above her head.
“Thank you Reginald, your honesty as always is very refreshing” one of the suits spoke in mumbling slurred speech with the loose jaw of a man longed for retirement.
Katie looked over as his voice distracted her and confirmed his age with her own eyes, another example of dinosaurs still clawing to the wealth of the field. Boothe acknowledged the platitude with a nod and leant forward to continue.
“Nurse Katie has been a model member of the team since she was brought onto the staff, her bedside manner is unlike any nurse in the county and while I agree, she was negligent in this instance and her temporary carelessness, a momentary lack of better judgement that caused a patient to almost succumb to extreme harm. I do believe that losing Katie from the staffing pool her at Greenwood would be an even larger example of poor judgement, something I am sure is not shared amongst these fine giants of medicine sitting before me” Boothe said, now laughing to encourage the board members to subconsciously agree with him and set aside his obvious insult that danced across the wooden laminate at their elbows.
“Very well said” another voice answered. “Thank you Reginald, I appreciate your level headed analysis and your honesty, I understand it is never easy criticising your own staff, especially when you had such emphasis on hiring them full-time in the first place as we can see in the nurses file” the original speaker replied, his voice carried a note of cynicism, perhaps he had been pierced by the otherwise missing insult that Boothe tacked onto his speech.
Although the words hovered in the air, the last few stuck to Katies ears.
“Boothe was pushing for me to get the job?” she thought to herself, missing some other pleasantries being exchanged in the room full of these apparent “Giants of medicine.”
It was a thought best left unattended for the time being, Katie snapped herself back into the moment as she was being addressed.
“Katherine, would you like to say anything before we conclude our ruling?” the speaker asked leaning forward in his deep receding chair.
“I will, thank you sir” she answered, hating the necessary politeness, she knew they loved it, the power of commanding a title no matter how small, but she buried the irritation once again with her memories of early Boothe exchanges, it was a price to pay to keep herself employed in a field she did love.
“Thank you Doctor Boothe for your words, I appreciate your support. It has been a challenging time as you can imagine” Katie said to the room, landing briefly in a shared gaze with Boothe, his half smile still fixed on.
“I made a mistake, I took a moment away from a situation that turned into a dangerous one for a patient I was tasked with keeping safe” she continued, swallowing back some breaths that threatened to bring tears with them, it was nerves pulling them forward. “I hope that my record of impeccable patient reports and my history being as incident free, up until this point, will allow me to continue working at Greenwood Heart” Katie added considering more words, but they were not forming fast enough in her mind. “Thank you all” she concluded now taking her seat and staring down at the floor between her feet.
“Thank you Katherine, it takes a lot of character to admit when you are wrong, especially in a room full of stuffy old men” the speaker jokingly replied, the room erupted in a few seconds of deep raspy laughter, the accumulating breath above them now pungent with the scent of wet cigars.
Katie grinned to show she was still their cooperative nurse.
“I have reviewed the patients files, I have seen his scans and taken some time to speak with Chief of Medicine Boothe, I believe in light of this continuing mysterious ailment that plagues the young, Mr Rubens, I believe that we are all in agreement that you will be allowed to return to work.” the speaker said to the room.
Katie felt life sparking in her legs, she sat up straight and leaned over to get the best look at the speaker, ensuring she did not mishear a single word.
“I believe you have shown that you are still Greenwood material, and we will allow this matter to be closed, however we would like to reiterate your position of care with our patience and will be placing you under probationary review for a month to ensure we are all moving forward together without any hiccups” the speaker added,
“Any questions?” another voice beside him called out.
“Yes, just a couple” Katie nervously replied, perhaps too fast to collect her thoughts, “firstly, thank you for letting me stay on at the hospital, I am extremely grateful” she offered the thanks as she knew it was expected of her judging by the pending medium mouthed glances around the room, they became smiles once again after they got their appreciation. “What would a review look like with my day-to-day work?” she asked shyly directed at the speaker.
“I can answer this one if you don’t mind” Boothe interrupted as the speaker began to address her questions, “I will be conducting one-to-ones every other day or so with you to assess your progress and iron out any concerns or issues that might arise for myself, the hospital or yourself” Boothe continued.
Katie saw it, there was the reason, he got his added pound of power over her back and the hospital board had rubber stamped it with their vacant uninvolved approval.
“If there are no further questions, I would like to thank everyone for coming. Let’s go enjoy the rest of our day” the speaker finished up the meeting, Katie smiled an unconvincing smile his way and made for the exit, seeing from the corner of her eye the speaker shaking hands and further encouraging Boothe.
“Stay on top of her Reg” the speaker instructed, “shouldn’t be too unpleasant” he added as Katie left the room, the whispers they spoke loud enough for everyone including herself to hear burning with shame.
It was hours later, the sky outside the windows had dulled and Katie sat at the nurses station listening to the chatter around her from various nurses on a variety of shifts crossing paths. She closed her eyes listening to the buzz, the white noise, it was a comforting melody that calmed her over the years of working there.
“What happened then? They obviously didn’t sack you” a voice asked Katie from behind the station counter, Katie flicked her eyes open and found her addresser, it was Beverly, an elderly nurse who still helped out with the paperwork and light duties while easing into retirement.
She was nosey, but Katie thought of her as a friend for the most part.
“I didn’t get in trouble, I got a telling off and they put me on some probation plan with Boothe, but I am still here” she joked extending her arms in celebration.
“Well, that’s good to see. I hate seeing good nurses get booted out of here for something as silly as that” Beverly replied, Katie cocked her head assuming she misunderstood the sentence.
“Silly as what Bev?” she asked watching Beverly shift round the counter and shuffle into her swivel back chair.
“You know, knocking off early to grab a tea” Beverly replied, her voice trailed off into a hushed whisper.
“Who told you that?” Katie asked inquisitively, she assumed people had been talking about what happened, but this was a much nicer lie than the truth, which should not be how rumours work she thought to herself.
“Couple of nurses, and that strange Michael fella that drives the private ambulance” Bev answered clearly losing interest in the conversation.
“Well, if that’s what they believe happened, I will take it and run to the bank” Katie laughed as she stretched her shoulders and climbed to her feet.
“Have a nice evening Bev” Katie wished kissing her on the forehead, she strolled off away from the station,
“I will try madame” Bev playfully threw back releasing the first natural smile across Katies face that day.
Later that evening Katie clocked out of work, the station was empty and halls slowly dwindling in activity, “Bev must have finally gone home” she thought aloud as she punched out her time card and scooped up her belongings from the floor. Wrestling the rubbish floating around in her bag she plucked out her keys and made the march to her car, clicking the satisfying clicker as she got close, then her phone rang. It caused her a fright as the day was now soothing down, her nerves from earlier had dissipated and turned to relief, grateful that she could indeed continue working somewhere she actually cared about, but the phone ringing loudly was jarring, Katie fished through a pond of useless belongings and found the cause of the noise. ‘Boothe,’ it read across the incoming call screen, it sent a shiver down her spine, the coldness was creeping back in. Katie answered it, much to the resistance in her mind.
“Hello?” she said with a quiet voice.
“Looks miserable out there. Do you want to come back inside and have a chat? Can have a coffee and talk about today” Boothe asked.
Katie knew he could see her from the little breadcrumbs he leaves in conversations ‘Looks miserable’ she recalled. Glancing back at the building behind her, much to her fears, she spotted Boothe standing at his office window staring down at her like a leering vulture.
“Umm, no, thank you but I need to get home tonight” Katie replied turning away to open her car door to drop her bag on the passenger seat.
“Well, that’s a real shame, I want this to work out well Katie. For both our sakes. Perhaps tomorrow” Boothe replied clicking off the phone ending the call.
Katie glanced at the phone to see if it had indeed been hung up, it had and stared back up at the window for a second more seeing it hosting Boothe like some cursed stained-glass window. He waved down slowly, and even from this distance, Katie saw the grin growing across that pudgy face, callous ideas no doubt brewing behind those manipulative eyes. The game was still being played, and Katie was now at a choice, a blurry crossroads, play the game or possibly lose her job and career, she swallowed the pride and the unpleasantness, throwing a half-hearted wave back up at the Senior Chief of Medicine framed in glass and concrete at the office window.
Organ: Chapter 6 of 30
